by Nicole Skotz, a member of the SkillCorps Indonesia October 2015 team

From the beginning of my journey with SkillCorps, I don’t think I was aware of the changes and realizations that the whole experience would bring out in me. Now with only 4 days left, and an excursion under our belts, these realizations and lessons learned are coming full circle. I was becoming aware of these changes a week in but was unsure how I would put them into words, until our trip leader, Cassie, told us a quote one night that was my blogspiration. The quote read, “My strength is in knowing that I can do anything, my weakness is my desire to do it all at once.” This quote put into perspective a lot of realities I had been dealing with prior to this trip. It made me see that trying to change everything that was making me feel unsettled, or unhappy all at once, won’t actually make me feel the way I thought it would. Rome wasn’t built overnight, nor will my happy ending. The thing is to focus on the something one at a time and learn from them individually. SkillCorps has given me the push I needed to make conscious efforts to break down my unsettled ways and find ways to change them.

On the other end of the spectrum, I see this quote as a part of SkillCorps philosophy and in the schedule for growth with each visit to the Hi5 Centre. Learning to tone down the great big ideas everyone brings to the table and coming to realistic conclusions is something that I think is out of everyone’s comfort zone at first. The growth of the center teaches me that we may have that desire to do it all at once but if we act upon it, sustainability will never be accomplished.

In both my personal journey with SkillCorps and my professional journey with SkillCorps if I have learned one thing it is that with no sustainability in life, success and happiness will never be accomplished. And in order to access sustainability we must move the weakness to the backburner, and move the strength to take control and focus on slow, but beneficial change to the fore front. Although I am aware when I get home I will have to remind myself of all these inspirational words I am writing down on this paper, I have realized something important. As I was blaming some elements of my current situation on my feelings of unhappiness and unsettlement there was only one person to blame and it was me. I was focusing so much on the negative aspects of my everyday life and feeling overwhelmed when thinking of how I am going to change it all that I forgot I have a lot of wonderful things that I could have been focusing in the meantime. I am not saying that I do not still want to change all of those things, because that is something that won’t go away, it is just that knowing and accepting that I can’t have it all now and to stop trying to. SkillCorps has truly taught me to be “stubborn with my goal, but flexible in my method” on becoming the person I know I can be.

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